Episode 7068 (5/19/2011) – Kareem Abdul-Jabbar

Colbert Report Episode Guide 150pxEPISODE NUMBER: 7068 (May 19, 2011)
GUESTS: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
SEGMENTS: John Lithgow Performs Gingrich Press Release; Better Know a District – Illinois’ Fightin’ 18th (Aaron Schock); Clergy-Matic Ecclesi-Action Center 3:16; History of Life on Earth
VIDEOS: Wednesday, May 19, 2011

John Lithgow better start preparing his next Emmy® acceptance speech for ‘Outstanding Performance as a Special Guest on an Outstanding Musical, Variety, or Special Class Talk Show Episode’… or is that category only in the Daytime Emmies®?

Ripped abs and BKADs are cool, but can I just say that “Clergy-Matic Ecclesi-Action Center 3:16″ may be my favorite TCR segment ever? And I’ve been a fan of Lew Alcindor Kareem Abdul-Jabbar since his college days at UCLA. I loved his running with the Basketball-Jazz analogy.

The History of Life on Earth video was just perfect, including all the important moments in our evolution. Truly.

Be sure to keep up with the Charleston-Bermuda Yacht race with the on-line tracking (brought to you in partnership with, I kid you not, “Garden & Gun” magazine). Stephen will be on The Spirit of Juno skippered by Rory Faulkner. And is that Report Head-Writer Barry Julien I see on the crew list?

Tell us what you thought of the show in the comments below the screen cap.
It's the End of the World

Comments

  1. Apparently Stephen has done this boat race before: http://www.postandcourier.com/news/2011/may/19/race-to-bermuda/

    And I too loved Colbert’s priest training. DO give sermons. DON’T molest anyone. NO questions. Yep, that’s pretty comprehensive.

    Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +3

  2. !!!!!!! Best. Episode. Of. The. Week. Stephen’s energy and enthusiasm was so catching and electric right from the beginning. Seriously, that man can make you feel good even without saying a word. Just his body language and his smile kept me smiling and feel elated the whole time. Being the theatre nut that I am, I had a major Broadway-gasm when John Lithgow appeared, which transitioned into a Tony-Award-worthy-performance-gasm throughout Lithgow’s passionate and professional performance of Gingrich’s press release. I was definitely one of those going omgomgomgomg etc. I enjoyed re-watching the BKAD piece on Schock (it’s been a long time since Stephen’s done one of those), and of course the character break right before that was adorable (appropriate considering that the end is upon us and we should be sent off with something happy…). And KAREEM!!! LOVED seeing him on the show. He and Stephen have such a great rapport with one another. Of course, I had a feeling that Stephen would refer to the Rapture at the closing, but after watching that montage, I feel sad again. Not because of the end of the world (being a non-Christian, I don’t count and will be left with the other heathens on Earth), but because of the reminder of the end of this wonderful blog and website. I’m happy that I joined even for a short time and was fortunate to take part in intelligent discussions with equally intelligent, wonderful people, and even though we have a new home, we will never forget the place where it all began for us in one way or another. Godspeed, NFZ. Thank you for everything.

    Difference makers: Thumb up +6

  3. I swear, I feel so much that this site has been part of the show, that last night I seriously expected him to say something about the end of NFZ and was a teeny bit disappointed when he didn’t. Then, I snapped out of my fantasy world and realized that with the rapture coming, of course he probably figured there would have to be an NFZ in heaven.
    And here I’ll be on earth. Hmmmph.
    Well, based on some of the very, um, “creative” and uh, “exciting” fangirl fiction I’ve been reading on ColbertNation, I will have terrific company down here.
    (Is it just me or is it hot in here?)
    Loved the interview with Kareem last night. Love that he is clearly an it-getter. I am trying not to think about the fact that this is the last time anyone will be writing comments on here about a specific episode…
    Well, happy travels for those being raptured…
    And see the rest of you around, I hope!

    Difference makers: Thumb up +5

  4. Gratefull says:

    Nine week run! A NINE WEEK RUN … TCR has been on a nine week run and, phew, everyone must be exhausted … I hope Stephen and Barry Julien have a MASSIVE time on the boat and come back with amazing video of antics on the high seas … and undoubtedly, they will beat Stephen’s last race placement … *grin* …

    Post & Courier Article, “This time, Colbert will skipper the Spirit of Juno, a yacht owned by OnDeck Group US, the race’s title sponsor. … The race starts at 1 p.m. Saturday in the harbor near James Island.”

    Captain Stephen’s boat, “The Spirit of Juno is a Farr 65 sailboat home ported in Portsmouth, England.”

    Great screen pic, Jennie … *be soothed my aching heart*

    Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +3

  5. lockhart43 says:

    Three cheers for John Lithgow! I love that guy. And it was cool to hear the audience cheer that much for him, too. Can he pull a Jeff Goldblum and pop by the show from time to time now, please and thank you?
    And for the record, Stephen looked unbelievable last night. A striped dress shirt and purple tie with a navy blue suit? Oh wardrobe department, I love you.

    Barry Julien’s going on the trip as well? That’s awesome! Best of luck to Stephen, Barry, and the entire sailing crew on their trip! Be safe!

    Jennie, I wanted to thank you, Ann, and Karenatasha for doing the episode guides these past few weeks, I really appreciate it!

    Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +4

    • I also want to echo the notion of wishing Stephen, Barry and the entire sailing crew good luck, have a great time, and be safe!!! Thanks for reminding me, lockhart43! Stephen DID look great last night, though that screencap and title makes my heart ache a little.

      Difference makers: Thumb up +5

      • Thanks for mentioning the title; I missed the fine print. :(

        Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +2

  6. Karenatasha says:

    What an episode! I was dying with the John Lithgow reading, Stephen’s “do preach the good word, don’t molest anyone” was hysterical and pointed, and the interview was fantastic.

    Sail on, Stephen, Barry, and the rest of the crew. May your toilets stay functional and the winds and waves be in your favor.

    Difference makers: Thumb up +7

  7. colbaby says:

    I cannot recommend the show “Dexter” enough. John Lithgow gave an incredible performance in..I think it was season 4, for which he won an emmy. He was so convincing in the role that I’ve been completely creeped out by him ever since. So getting to laugh out loud at him in this episode was a relief. (I think I disturbed the guy in the flat next door, I was laughing so hard when he said “…Gingrich.”)

    The Clergy Matic was fantastic. “There ARE no questions…EVER.” I’m an atheist, but I said an amen to that.

    ReCAPTCHA: depart orthaves. Oh ReCAPTCHA, I think I’ll miss you the most.

    Difference makers: Thumb up +5

    • Karenatasha says:

      Here, here! I second that–John Lithgow gave one of the most amazing, creepy performances ever seen on “Dexter.”

      Difference makers: Thumb up +5

  8. So I typed this while stranded in the airport, and I just realized it’s super long. But this is my Taping ReporT!

    Stephen comes bounding out, and kisses the warmup guy before saying hello to us. He started singing “Friday” unprompted (no complaints here, because that song is actually okay if he sings it), and then he talked about how he was looking through NBC’s Emmy submissions flipbook since he’s an Emmy voter, and when he came to “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon”’s page, he saw his own “f***ing face!!!” So apparently they submitted the “Friday” episode, and after we cheered, he said, “No! Booooo! He’s using me to try to get an Emmy!” Then he said he wasn’t mad at him because they’re BFFSMs, but after August 3rd it might be different. 

    After that, he started the Q&A. I can’t remember all of the questions (it seemed like he took a lot more questions than the last time I went to a taping, probably because we waited longer), but here are the ones I remember. A girl asked which LoTR character he would choose to be with if he were stuck on a deserted island, and since I have minimal LoTR knowledge, I don’t know who he picked, but whoever he picked could fly, so they could leave the island. Then he asked the girl who she would pick, and she said Aragorn. Then Stephen said, “Aragorn…or Viggo Mortensen?” He said whenever someone enters the studio on the left (left of his desk, if you’re sitting in the audience), they call it “Entering Viggo” because he was the first person to come in from that direction. Then he went through the rest of the studio entrances, because they’ve all been named after the first person to use it. Also, the sides of his desk are called “Sitting _____” (I can’t remember names). And now the entrance Lithgow (his appearance was a complete surprise) used is called “Entering Lithgow.” :) Okay, other questions. Someone asked who his favorite modern playwright was, and after a lot of deliberation, he settled on Tom Stoppard (he mentioned Pinter). Then he talked about how much he enjoyed Arcadia when he saw it in New York. Another person asked where he might be able to find him around the Montclair area, to which Stephen replied, “I live in the New York area!” Eventually he said, “Out and about town…the Y…I love stalkers.” A woman asked if his commencement speech at Northwestern would be done in or out of character, and he said he wasn’t sure because he never knows who’s being invited. The last question I can remember was what his favorite thing was that he discovered about his character, and he said he really liked the bits about Charlene and the restraining order. After singing a little bit of “I’m Right Behind You, Charlene,” he said he just finished recording a SEQUEL!! It’s called “I’m Over You, Charlene” (or maybe “Charlene, I’m Over You”? I don’t quite remember the order). 

    Character breaks! I was hoping for at least one and was definitely not disappointed. They kept one break in, but he also cracked up when the priest raised his hand the second time during the Catholic segment, so they had to back up a line or two. After he flubbed the line, he told us there was a secret about today’s show, and that he’d tell us afterwards. Then they had some technical issues when he was introducing Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. The camera shut off randomly in the middle of his sentence, so Stephen was like, “Wow! I …[camera shuts off] whaaaaaaaaa???” He attributed the camera failure to his overwhelmingly good looks (and really, who can argue with that?).

    After the show, he told us the secret. He had been having terrible vertigo and back spasms all day, and he thanked us for being enthusiastic because he said when we laughed and cheered, we were more effective than his prescription drugs and his back didn’t hurt at all. So sweet! I hope he feels better. And then he left, and it was over. I didn’t even mind the wait this time despite the delays, and I finally caught a WRISTSTRONG bracelet!

    Difference makers: Thumb up +14

    • colbaby says:

      Thanks so much, Sy!

      “He had been having terrible vertigo” And he’s about to go on a boat? D:

      Difference makers: Thumb up +5

      • AND back spasms. I don’t know how he does it, I really don’t. I’m praying he has a miraculous recovery before the race begins.

        Difference makers: Thumb up +5

      • Karenatasha says:

        Oh, that’s the first thing I thought: On a boat? With vertigo and back problems? Oy.

        Thanks so much for that taping ReporT, Sy! It was awesome.

        Difference makers: Thumb up +6

    • That is Awesome!!! Thanks for sharing your reporT with us!!! Makes me want to go back again!

      Difference makers: Thumb up +5

    • Thanks for that very nice taping reporT! I’m glad we had one more of those before signing off. A sequel “Charlene”? Oh, can’t wait to hear that!

      Difference makers: Thumb up +6

    • This is so great, Syl! Thanks for the taping reporT!! I’m really glad that we got in one last one before the end! I guess that’s what DB meant when she said that Stephen “hadn’t been feeling 100%” when she interviewed him yesterday. :/ I hope he feels better soon! But it’s great how the audience cheering and laughing helped him feel better more than his meds! See? Laughter really IS the best medicine!

      Difference makers: Thumb up +5

    • lockhart43 says:

      Great reporT, Sy, thanks so much! He sang for you unprovoked, and you witnessed a character break? Lucky you! I’m thrilled that there’s a sequel to “Charlene” – I welcome any and all opportunities to hear Stephen sing. And poor Stephen; he’s such a trooper. Here’s hoping he feels better before tomorrow.

      Thanks again Sy! I’m glad you had a good time!

      Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +4

    • Gratefull says:

      Yikes, vertigo and back spasms … now, sounds like he will replace his rum with vicodin … only, don’t mix them … sure hope the roll of the ocean actually helps … ouch … take care, Captain Colbert!

      Thanks, Sy, for a marvelous Taping ReporT!

      Difference makers: Thumb up +6

      • lockhart43 says:

        Captain Colbert. I don’t know why I’ve never thought to call him that before, it’s got such a nice ring to it!

        Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +4

        • somuch2kno says:

          I wonder if they’ll be adding that title to the closing show credits?! Doesn’t it go in order of most recently bestowed? So it would be Captain The Rev. Sir Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, D.F.A. Snerk!

          Difference makers: Thumb up +6

    • Sy, thanks so much for that amazing reporT; I was hoping at least one Zoner would be there, especially once Lithgow started speaking!

      Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +3

  9. Galadriel says:

    This episode was one of those that will become the stuff of legend. I’m still smiling from watching it, especially the Lithgow reading! What a tasty way to finish off the week, and NFZ episode reporTs.

    Get well soon, Stephen; we’re all rooting for you.

    Difference makers: Thumb up +6

  10. Arkadina says:

    John. Lithgow.

    Fecking. Brilliant.

    Thank. You.

    Difference makers: Thumb up +5

  11. Jennie & Sy, thank you for the Episode Guide and the Taping ReporT, respectively.
    I wholeheartedly agree with Arkadina’s Lithgow experience. Breathtaking.
    Was the priest in the audience Father James Martin? He looked familiar? If so, nice (um, NON) touch!
    Sigh. I remember when KAJ was Lew Alcindor – ok, I was in elementary school, but still! It’s unbelieveable there is no statue in his honor. I want to see that documentary. There is so much genuine American history I know NOTHING about. I’ve never downloaded anything from Netfix before, though.

    Waaaaaaaaaah! I cannot fathom watching TCR without Episode Guides. I want to thank DB, Jennie, Kaerenatasha, and Ann G. (as well as other Completists who have stepped in from time to time) for your dedication in writing these wonderful epistles. Thanks from the bottom of my heat to you and my fellow Zoners. You’re ALL Difference Makers!

    Stephen, Barry, & crew: Have a marvelous adventure, hope the toilets work, & please, please, please stay safe!

    Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +4

    • LOL!! “…nice, um NON-touch!” Love it!

      The priest, I believe was one of the writers for the show, but i can’t remember which one!

      Shout Out (Hey!): Thumb up +1

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