Colbert Report Episode guideEPISODE NUMBER: 6034 (March 9, 2010)
GUESTS: Annie Leonard
SEGMENTS: Stephen Colbert Consumer Alert, The WØRD: Define & Conquer
VIDEOS: Tuesday, March 9, 2010

First, I’d like to thank MsInterpreted for helping with the guide yesterday (and with a few power boosts for today’s episode as well). Secondly, I would like to say that it’s 6:30a and the full episode video is not up and I’m seriously missing Hulu right about now.

I’ve got the fever for the flavor of a new episode, Zoners! The ingredients in Taco Night Pringles? A thing of beauty. And while the news cycle is overrun with health care coverage, I’m so ready for something to be passed. I’m insured, and it still cost me $530 to get an MRI yesterday morning due to the deductible. And I’m seriously worried if they find they’re going to have to do surgery on my knee. Paying 30% of a buttload (plus the deductible) is still a buttload. *sigh* Can I please move to Canada long enough to get my knee fixed?

Nothing makes you realize how much stuff you have than moving. And after last month’s move, I realized that sweet baby Jesus, I have too much crap. I found it seriously ironic that she puts down watching TV on a television show. I do see her point though – too much time is wasted shopping and watching TV as opposed to reading, conversing, and generally being a sociable person. Even last night, I stayed home and watched “Lost” because I was just too worn out to go out with some friends. (But a Ben Linus episode?! Sign me up! Love him, LOVE him! So glad they didn’t kill him off. And that moment at the end where he says, with tears in his eyes, “He’s the only one who will have me”, I just wanted to pick him up and hug him, even if he has murdered pretty much everyone who’s ever died on the island. Also, Alex being his student in the Flash Sideways was total awesomesauce. So great to see Guyliner back, and seeing that Widmore is in fact, on his way. But I digress.)

Don’t forget to check out the movie The Story of Stuff, and let us know what you thought of it in the comments!

Stephen Colbert dances to It's Raining Men

  • I hope you already have sent back your previously recalled item, the Agribaby Cribside Mulcher.
  • I know, I know — Taco Night! Which doesn’t just deliver the flavor of a taco, hell, even a taco can do that. These capture the whole Taco Night! It’s right here in the ingredients, see? It says, um: whey, vegetable solids, sunflower oil, opening the refrigerator and seeing there’s nothing else and deciding to make tacos even though you made them two nights ago, cheddar cheese, maltodextrin, salt, Alex tell your sister to come downstairs it’s taco night — what do you mean she’s at Brian’s house? — rice, flour, onion powder, no we can’t eat in front of the TV we’re gonna dine as a family, dried tomato, malic acid, fine — if you don’t want to eat what’s being served, everyone can fend for themselves and watch this family fall apart, but if anyone wants to join me, I’ll be in the dining room enjoying tacos, disodium phosphate, paprika extract, take off that sombrero Alex, I will not be mocked! Oh, and potatoes.
  • No! We can’t lose Rush! If he leaves, who will make fun of people with Parkinson’s? When the rest of us do it, it seems kind of mean.
  • Words have power, they can hit you like a fist. Especially if you write them on your fist.
  • Hahah, she is great. [G-R-A-T-E]
  • [Instead of "Offensive Stereotype," "The Situation"]
  • It seems like people still like the idea of health care. And why not, health + care. Those are just two positive words jammed together. [Like Cheeseburger + Pringle]
  • And couldn’t breathing just be “oxygen addiction?” [Or Restless Lung Syndrome]
  • Now who wants the Democrats to pull a legislative gang bang so rubber gloved ass probers can keep you from going to heaven? You know what? We might need health care, because you people are sick.
  • Though I’m not sure I trust a public official who has to cut people open to see that they have arms and legs.
  • The red circle represents my unquestioning support for the troops, and the blue circle represents my universal condemnation of anything gay, including but not limited to boxer briefs, Jersey Boys, smart cars and baby carrots.
  • Yeah, that’s better, I like lady boobs. They got those, whatchacallit, those niblets on the front.
  • This can mean only one of two things. Either he believes that respecting the integrity of my fellow humans is more important than my safety, or the pope is hiding something.
  • Maybe the Pope doesn’t want to be scanned because he’s a lady. Think about it – he never wears pants, he loves his Prada pumps, and I’ve never seen him with a girlfriend. And I gotta say, as a man, he’s kind of spooky. But as a woman, those are some smokey come-hither eyes.
  • Look, I’m not saying I want to be eaten. I’m just saying it’s nice to be asked.
  • Our diet has practically made us a new species – Hoho sapiens.
  • You must be going “Whee, let’s have a depression!”
  • Are you saying that my beanbag chair is …. gay?
  • I hate to tell you this, but this book is stuff.


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