Again our Zoners come through in helping us get the word out to Stephen Colbert fans who could not make it to an event. Thanks so much, Wildlymissingthemark, for the fantastic writeup!

Stephen Colbert (L), Steve Carell (C) and Scott Allman perform a skit as part of celebrations marking the 50th anniversary of improv theater, The Second City, in Chicago December 12, 2009.

Stephen Colbert (L), Steve Carell (C) and Scott Allman perform a skit as part of celebrations marking the 50th anniversary of improv theater, The Second City, in Chicago December 12, 2009.

Just wanted to give you my report from the Alumni show. I was so fortunate and blessed to be there, I flew in just for the weekend, and I was not disappointed.

I

Stephen actually participated in 3 scenes. He and Paul were the first alumni to appear onstage. They perform a scene from 1993. In the first scene, Stephen and Paul are brothers, and they are playing some kind of fantasy basketball game with that hilarious cheapy little hoop. They stalk around the stage, in slow motion, and doing that hissing cheering thing. They keep inserting Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen’s names and narrating some kind of playoff game. (It kind of sounded like the Dana Carvey show skit when Stephen is doing that endless narration about the basketball playoffs.) In pops their mother Amy, who comes over to see if they have thanked their father for giving them some money or something. She gives them some sidelong glances, makes her usual assortment of faces, and goes back in the house.

As they are playing, the subject comes up that Paul has lent his younger brother Stephen $2,000, and he supposed to be going to school or doing something for his career with it. Stephen is unemployed, and Paul becomes upset because Stephen informs him that he has purchased a ticket to go to Africa instead. Paul is telling him that his peak earning potential is at age 35, so he’d better get his act together before this golden opportunity passes him by. You could tell that they keep the actual script from 1993 in tact, because Stephen’s character says “In 6 years I am going to be 35,” and Paul says rather hilariously, “You really aren’t taking good care of yourself.” Stephen broke character just a touch at this, and it was adorable.

While they are arguing, Amy comes out again briefly, but it happens so fast it is hard for me to remember exactly what she said.

Paul becomes despondent when it becomes clear that the money is gone and Stephen may or may not have just spent it all on a trip to Africa to “find himself.” He sulks in the corner, and Stephen tries to get him to play the basketball game again. Gradually Stephen wins him over again, and they go back to “playing” their “game.”

II

The second scene you don’t see in the pictures here. Stephen comes out to introduce a scene that dated from around 1961. He explains that one of the second city founders wrote it based on the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” When the scene begins, a much older alum (I am sorry I didn’t quite have his name), sits down and starts up his record player. Stephen’s voice narrates the record, he starts asking the guy some simple questions (how are you? Do you like your job? Do you have a gal?, etc), and then proceeds to run right over any of the guy’s bumbling attempts at answer. Stephen as the narrator also sings a little song and tries to get the guy to sing with him, and that was cute. Basically, it is reminiscent of the Strangers with Candy “Dreams on the Rocks” episode when Jellineck is listening to the record “So you want to become an artist.” It was nice to hear Stephen interacting with this particular alum, because you could tell he was one of the original cast members.

III

The third scene in which Stephen appeared is the one that completely blew me away. I mean, just mowed me over. It was the Maya scene! You know the one that Stephen has mentioned several times that he was so fond of. A younger cast member came out to introduce the scene, saying that it was the few scenes that originated from audience suggestion of using Maya Angelou as a reference to become part of an actual show.

Basically Stephen and Steve Carell come out looking smart and spiffy in their suits. Stephen is telling Steve how excited he is to show him his small, southern hometown, how much he loves it and so on. Then a series of ladies come out and embrace Stephen warmly. They call Stephen “Shirley Wentworth.” They are saying things like, “Shirley we want you to come see our children,” and “Shirley we are so happy to have you back home.” “We are so proud of you for you becoming a wonderful poet.” Stephen reacts to these people as though it were completely normal for them to be referring to him as a woman. Stephen then turns to Steve, and as almost an afterthought, says, “Oh, by the way, when I am home, I am an old black woman.” Steve Carell’s expressions are one of aghast and silent terror. It was just perfect.

One man comes out and says, “Oh Shirley Wentworth, now my property values are going to go down. Why don’t you get out of here” or something to that effect. Steve, who has been simply standing in stunned silence, actually becomes angry at his blatant racism, and yells at the guy, saying something like “Get out of here you no good racist!” Also, as Stephen (or Shirley) is introducing Steve to the residents of the town, they start calling him “Sarah.” They would say things like, “Oh, it was nice seeing you Sarah.” It is clear that they see him as an old black woman too.

As this is happening, Steve starts freaking out (a la even Stephven Elian Gonzales scene) and saying “I am so confused, I don’t know what’s happening.” Stephen is trying to reassure and console him.

Then, this sweet man (Dave Razowsky) appears on stage left, looking every bit like an old fashioned southern gentleman. He clutches his hat, and says “Shirley Wentworth, I can’t believe you are back in town.” He is absolutely smitten with Shirley, and approaches her in a dreamlike state. He is congratulating her on her professional success, and then makes a repeat attempt at an old marriage proposal. Shirley says something about how “no one in the town could accept a relationship” between the two of them, as it would be scandalous for a white man and a black woman to be together. Then, tenderly and gently, they kiss. They certainly kiss for quite a long moment, and by now the audience is absolutely roaring.

By the end of the scene, Steve’s transformation into Sarah is complete, and he accepts the perception of him as a black woman as well.

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