Colbert Report Episode guideEPISODE NUMBER: 5152 (December 1, 2009)
GUESTS: Brother Guy Consolmagno, Sherman Alexie
SEGMENTS: Obama announces his Afghanistan plan, Better Know a Made-Up District
VIDEOS: Tuesday, December 1, 2009

What a delightful episode! Stephen packed in the silly, but also managed to have some really great interviews as well. I rarely transcribe an entire segment of the show – quite frankly, I just don’t have the time most mornings. But there was no way I was going to let the Made-Up District diatribe fall to the wayside. With pop culture references like the sleestacks and Snuffleupagus, it was just an entire Apopcalypse post unto itself. But to have him interview Brad Pitt? Absolutely delish. Of course, I still can’t think of the movie ‘Fight Club’ without thinking that you can grate Reggiano Parmigiano on that stomach.

While I would have loved to hear more about the actual book being promoted, it was an interesting discussion between Sherman and Stephen about the effect of technology on how people relate to the culture of books. I have yet to own a Kindle, but it’s not something that really appeals to me. I love the experience of being in a book store, and holding the books and reading snippets before purchasing. And I love my “First Edition” ribbon in my copy of ‘I Am America (And So Can You!)’.

However, that being said, you will pry my iPhone out of my cold, dead hand. I’m extremely dependent on my technology for keeping in contact with my family, friends, and last but not least the Zoners and Completists who make this blogging experience so fulfilling. Would I love to have a face-to-face meeting with all of you? Heck yeah I would! But since that is both geographically and economically impossible, technology allows us to meet in ways that could have never happened 20 years ago. While in some ways technology keeps us from having some of the face-to-face contact that we had in the past, it also allows us to build relationships with people who have the specific micro niche interests that we have from all over the country and world.

I know that there are many nuances of Sherman’s position that weren’t quite clear during the interview, and I hope that our resident literary expert, MsInterpreted, will jump on and add to the discussion.

What did you all think of this episode?

Stephen Colbert - December 1, 2009

  • Yeah! Who is the President? Obama is acting like some kind of chief who is commander of the Armed Forces!
  • Exactly! Listen to the people who you fire for incompetence!
  • What’s that Joe? What? You agree with Barack Obama? You’re fired! Literally. And I’m replacing you with My Little Pony. What’s that Pinkie Pie? You agree with Glenn Beck? Good girl!
  • One detail that blew me away? That the site cost $18 million dollars. Now true, you can make a web site for $18 dollars, but this one has so many great things to click and track, you could easily spend the entire day on this site since there’s a good chance you don’t have a job.
  • That’s right, the stimulus packages isn’t just creating jobs, it’s creating congressional districts out of thin air.
  • I’ve been burned before, Interior Secretary Amanda Huginkiss.
  • Which brings me to my first installment of my [mumble] part district – Better Know a Made-Up District.
  • Connecticut’s 42nd district is located in the middle of the River Styx, and appears only once every 100 years. The 42nd is populated by a diverse mix of whites, blacks, hispanics, and sleestacks. The district’s largest city is Atlantis, whose controversial mayor Snuffleupagus made headlines recently thaks to a torrid affair with the elusive Chupacabra. The 42nd has a proud tradition of unicorn breeding, celebrated at the annual unicorn rodeo where riders who can stay on a bucking unicorn for 8 seconds live forever. Notable residents of the 42nd include Norm’s wife Vera, Charlie Brown’s teacher, and the smoke monster from ‘Lost’. And who has the secret sack to represent the 42nd? Why it’s Freshman congressman Brad Pitt’s character from ‘Fight Club’!
  • You can start gay marrying meat on Friday because it is over!
  • If I wanted a God who had complete creative freedom, I would worship James Cameron.
  • Maybe they’re trying to find aliens and convert them to Catholicism. Oh, hello! Japanese?
  • We could be double-booking our saviors here?
  • Who would win – Angel or Predator? I only ask because I’m working on a screenplay.
  • It’s a slippery slope from reading to writing.
  • You can’t burn a Kindle.
  • I just want to say, they prefer to be called Native Americans. I would like to apologize to any of my Native American viewers for that offensive, racist comment. You’re not from India.

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