StandUp2Cancer Fondue Lunch winner shares his story with No Fact Zone!

You may remember that a few months back, we brought news of an eBay auction featuring a fondue lunch with Stephen Colbert, supporting the StandUp2Cancer charity. The winner of that auction has come to No Fact Zone (with help from Zoner Smashley) to share his amusing and amazing story with us!

The charity, StandUp2Cancer, conducted a fund raising auction on eBay, which ended on September 15, 2008. One of the auction items was a cheese fondue lunch with Stephen T. Colbert. My name is Jim Ruprecht; I was the lucky winner of that auction item, and below is the story or my and my daughter’s, Rebecca’s, excellent Colbert Adventure.

We enjoyed our cheese fondue lunch with Mr. Stephen T. Colbert on Thursday, April 2, 2009 at a restaurant called “Kashkaval“; it is a cheese market and wine bar located in that part of New York City known as “Hell’s Kitchen.”

Stephen’s assistant, Amy, contacted me a few weeks after the auction closed to schedule our lunch. Amy is amazing and was an absolute joy to work with (she admits to having the best job in the world, but I am willing to bet my next week’s grocery money that Stephen would also admit to being lost without her). With them wanting to get past the 2008 election and subsequent inauguration (a time of heightened activity for the already hyper Colbert Report team), with their subsequent hiatus, and wanting to work around Rebecca’s and my own work schedules, we settled on April 2nd. To our pleasant surprise, in addition to lunch, Amy also arranged a couple of seats in the audience for us at the taping of that night’s show (the guest at that evening’s show was Biz Stone, founder of Twitter).

Interestingly, the restaurant that Amy had originally selected, La Bonne Soupe, had a fire on March 19th and had to close for several weeks for repairs. Because the show was on hiatus when this happened, Amy wasn’t aware of it until she returned and got my email about it on Monday, March 30th. I only became aware of it the weekend before when I went to La Bonne Soupe’s website to check them out and saw the notice they had posted about the fire and being closed. So, on the Monday of the week we were to meet, Amy had to find a new place for us to have lunch—a task which I imagine can’t be that easy when you’re arranging lunch for someone like Stephen Colbert and you want to ensure some measure of privacy. But she pulled it off, and that is how we ended up at Kashkaval.

Amy took care of everything—making the reservations and pre-ordering our meal. She scheduled lunch for noon that day, and asked that we arrive a few minutes early; she would see to it that Stephen arrived shortly thereafter. We arrived a little before noon; the folks at Kashkaval were very gracious and down-to-earth, and they sat us at a quite table in a back corner. We were seated with our backs to the door, so we couldn’t see Stephen when he arrived; when he did, at about 12:15, he greeted us very warmly, and apologized for being a little late.

It turns out that he was delayed because he was on the phone with the folks at NASA working out a mutually acceptable solution to NASA’s problem with naming the ISS module “COLBERT,” even though The Nation had put Stephen’s name over the top by a couple of hundred thousand votes. Stephen assured us that although they wouldn’t be naming the module after him, something in space surely would be, and as everyone now knows it is the “Combined Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill.”

Stephen was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt; he was very down-to-earth, with wonderfully cheerful energy. I asked him if he looked forward to a lunch such as this with dread or excitement—I could see it going either way. He explained that this was only the second time that he had such a lunch—the demands of the show are just that great—but he was very happy to do so for StandUp2Cancer. He went on to thank us for our contribution, and did seem genuinely happy to have lunch with us.

We were offered whatever we wanted to drink; Rebecca had water, Stephen and I had Diet Cokes. We were served two different cheese fondues: Classic Swiss (made with a blend of emmenthaler and gruyere) and Kashkaval (made with kashkaval and extra virgin olive oil), and for dipping we were served baskets of French baguettes, a plate of different meats (kielbasa, chistorra, and chorizo), and a plate of various vegetables (mushrooms, broccoli, cauliflower, and tomatoes). The meat plate and the Kashkaval fondue were the first to go.

We began with the usual small talk: Stephen asked where we worked, where we lived, etc. When we told him we were from Minnesota, we joked about the trouble that an otherwise sensible state is having electing a senator. However, the spirit of full disclosure compelled us to confess that not only were we from Minnesota, but we were also from Minnesota’s 6th District—the one represented by Rep. Michelle Bachmann. We explained that we normally don’t share that information, but just wanted to get that on the table right away.

We discussed the role Congresswoman Bachmann appears to have taken on the national stage, and told Stephen about the very first piece of legislative correspondence that we received from her as our Congresswoman (outside of the normal newsletter). It was a mailing to promote her “Freedom of Light Bulb Choice Act” which she was introducing to ensure that Americans would always have the freedom to choose between incandescent and compact fluorescent light bulbs. With all of the other issues crying out for informed attention, we were more than a little disappointed that she had chosen this great light bulb controversy as her first legislative dragon to slay.

The cheese fondue arrived and Stephen invited us to ask him about anything we’d like. We asked him about his career and kidded him about the Mr. Goodwrench commercials he had done for GM many years ago. Stephen explained that he started his career in dramatic acting in Chicago, but didn’t enjoy it—he enjoyed Chicago; he didn’t enjoy dramatic acting. He explained that, to him, acting was about trying to capture the audience in silence—no feedback until your performance is over. Whereas in comedy, for good or bad, you get immediate audience feedback, and he found this more rewarding. Further, his experience with actors and actresses was that they were very egocentric and highly competitive. Conversely, most comedians were openly flawed individuals; in fact, their comedy usually flowed from those flaws. Also, it was his experience that there was far more collegiality among comedians. For example he cited his experience that when a comedian bombed there was great empathy among the other comedians because they had all been there.

Stephen told us about his concept behind ‘The Colbert Report’ and his character. He sees ‘The Colbert Report’ as an on-going play, with each episode being an act in that play. He explained that while he had always wanted his character to be highly narcissistic and egocentric, it was a Bill O’Reilly interview that nailed it for him. It’s not that Bill O’Reilly isn’t narcissistic and egocentric to a sufficiently inspiring degree on his own. However, Stephen explained that he was watching Bill O’Reilly interview George W. Bush and after Bush responded to one of O’Reilly’s questions, O’Reilly responded to the President’s response by saying, “Yeah, but guys like you and me…” When Stephen saw O’Reilly, a talk show host, put himself on the same plane as the President of the United States, he said that set a new narcissism bar for his own character on ‘The Colbert Report’ to beat.

We talked more about the show and he explained that there are 91 people involved in putting the show on the air. We asked him about where he gets these folks because the caliber of their research is amazing—I suggested that someone running for office would be well served to hire The Colbert Report team for their campaign staff. He explained that they do indeed have journalistic heavyweights on their staff, that this is by design, and he stressed the importance of the teamwork that goes into making his character successful.

Stephen also talked about the pace and dynamism involved in putting on a show like ‘The Colbert Report’. For example, him getting out for a one-hour lunch, like he was with us, was highly unusual; normally they are at the studio from 8:30 am – 9:30 pm every day they’re taping (apparently they tape for 13 weeks, take a hiatus, tape another 13 weeks, another hiatus, and so on). He explained that everyone carries a pager or cell phone because they have to be reachable literally on a moment’s notice. If someone pings you, and you take more than one minute to respond, they wonder what’s happened to you—immediate response is the expectation.

Rebecca and I had brought along our copies of Stephen’s book, I Am America (And So Can You)!, and asked if he would autograph them, which he happily did. This led to a discussion of what went into writing his book and the whole publishing business. He shared that when he was asked to write a book, he engaged his whole team, and they did so very mindful of how they might weave elements of the book into the show. The book took a long time to write and publish, and a lot of people worked very hard on it; they also had a lot of creative and exciting plans for ways they would weave different elements of the book into the show. Unfortunately, the book came out at the same time that the writers went out on strike, and, as you’ll recall, that strike was a prolonged one. By the time the strike was settled, so much time had elapsed that Stephen felt that the opportunity for weaving elements of the book into the show had passed and they abandoned those plans.

Stephen did share a couple of his favorite stories about the book. One, which he said surprised him in that so few people noticed, involved the ribbon bookmark that came with those books in the initial printing. You’ll recall his warning to readers that counterfeit copies of his book were circulating, and that they could tell if they had an authentic copy or a fake by the monogram on the ribbon. Of course the monogram on the ribbons deliberately didn’t match the one he cites in the book as the authentic one.

Also, the company that printed the book’s cover jacket was different than the one that printed the book itself, and in subsequent printings Stephen included deliberate mistakes in the text of the back cover so as to further suggest it was a counterfeit. However, apparently no one informed the company that printed the cover jackets, and that company assumed the cover had gone through a final proofreading before it got to them. So, embarrassed by noticing the several, but blatant, misspellings only after the cover jackets were printed, they apologetically contacted Stephen and vowed to correct the mistakes and reprint the covers—until Stephen explained to them that those misspellings were a deliberate part of the counterfeit gag.

Our conversation about his book experience was particularly interesting to me because I, too, was/am writing a book. In fact, after he autographed our copies of his book, I showed Stephen a “pre-galley” copy of my book (i.e., the cover hadn’t been designed, the interior layout hadn’t been designed, and it hadn’t gone through all of its edits, but it was in a 6″ x 9″ book format). I noted the award his book had won, “The Stephen T. Colbert Award For The Literary Excellence,” and asked him how I could win such an award.

So, we had a semi-serious conversation about my book, my motivations for writing it, and I told him he could have that copy. He was very quick and forthright to point out that he would not read it—he didn’t have time (which I totally get)—but he would give it to that member of his staff that does screen books (which was a pleasant surprise); although he also quickly added that he made no promises about that person reading the book either (which I totally get, as well).

Tickled that he found my book of some interest, I got back to the question about how a guy like me could win “The Stephen T. Colbert Award For The Literary Excellence.” He smiled and said that the first step was to be nominated—so he nominated me! He reached for my copy of his book and flipped to the page containing “The Stephen T. Colbert Award For The Literary Excellence-Nominee” stickers. He pulled one of the stickers off, stuck it on the cover of my book and invited me to slide over to his side of the table for a picture. So we got out our camera, and Rebecca took a picture of me with Stephen holding a copy of my book showing “The Stephen T. Colbert Award For The Literary Excellence-Nominee” sticker on the cover. What an amazing, and pleasant surprise!

It was also an incredibly generous surprise because when I asked him if I could incorporate “The Stephen T. Colbert Award For The Literary Excellence-Nominee” sticker into my book’s cover design, he said that I could; and when I asked him if I could used the photo we had just took in promoting my book, he said, “Yes, of course, use it all.” What an incredibly amazing and generous act!

Rebecca got her picture taken with Stephen and receiving the official Stephen T. Colbert Thumbs-Up sign of approval [seen at the top of this post].

We finished lunch talking about that night’s show, and Twitter, and even though he was 15 minutes late, Stephen stayed with us for a full hour.

It was an incredible lunch. Stephen treated us like regular folks and not like we were an imposition. The conversation was snappy, witty, and genuine. He autographed our copies of his book. I got an unexpected nomination from him for my book. We both got our photos taken with him. Plus, we got a fondue lunch!

However, our Colbert Adventure was only half over, there was still that night’s show, which they tape at 7:00 pm. So, we wandered over to The Colbert Report’s office and studio around 6:00, went to the entrance that Amy instructed us to use, checked in with security, and got to meet Amy in-person.

We were then escorted to what looked like a conference area in their office; it was decorated with various props from previous shows. We hung out there until another person came to escort us to the studio where they had two seats reserved for us in the second row.

Before the show, they had a stand-up comedian to warm up the audience. Then Stephen came out and took some questions from the audience. The one question that I remember is when Stephen was asked who his favorite rock group was—his answer: The Who. Then we got to listen to the banter between Jon Stewart and Stephen while they were both off-air, and then Jon’s throw to Stephen when they came back on-air. The audience was jazzed, the show was Colbert high-energy!

After the show, while the rest of the audience was asked to exit the studio, we were allowed to hang around and take a few pictures on the set.

April, 2, 2009 was a most excellent day for these two members of the Colbert Nation!