EPISODE NUMBER: 5034 (March 10, 2009)
GUESTS: William Gerstenmaier, Dr. Jay Keasling
SEGMENTS: Michael Steele Rap-off, Node 3 Update, Stephen drinks coffee
VIDEOS: Monday, March 10, 2009
High energy starts to shows amuse me ever so. I heard from Zoner Flatpoint Grief Counselor, who was at the show tonight, that there was quite a bit of Bollywood talk before the show. That would explain the opening joke. Hopefully she’ll come on and give us a report on the details of the reported dancing. The Michael Steele Rap-off just gets more and more interesting the more that Stephen builds it up. His dope rhymes are as hysterical as they are painful.
The coffee sketch was an interesting choice for the second segment. I so love writer cameos, and our second night in a row with one featured Barry Julien. So glad he got rehired after the layoff! I sure hope Frank still has his job.
Science interviews are always my favorite on the show. The husband noticed that Dr. Jay Keasling turned a bit pink after the yeast infection crack. Then again, I imagine I might blush a bit, too. The audience seemed to like the joke, that’s for sure.
If I missed one of your favorite quotes from tonight, please feel free to mention it in the comments. I love hearing what each of you has to say each night!
- Ooh, the sista is trippin’! I hope I got that right. I might have meant The sista is buggin’.
- Grand master Steele, you mike tease, I don’t know if you’ve seen 8 Mile, but a key part of every rap battle is showing up to the rap battle.
- I’ll have to toss them into the recycling bin, by which I mean P. Diddy.
You’ve left me no choice but to go gangsta and pop a cap in your POP Mail account. - So prepare to download my flow, be-yotch!
- But you’re gonna get dunked like chamomile tea.
- P.S. I’ve also included some great lawyer jokes.
- And I am not fronting, because I do not know what Fronting means.
- It turns out the contest is fixed, and not in a good way by my tech nerd army.
- Serenity? That’s not a space module, that’s a Glade plugin.
- Or maybe because they want to attack Jew-piter. That was certainly worth the wait.
- Jimmy, I believe we have a picture of earth from space.
- And Florida is an earth-like planet?
- I want to warn all my viewers to not stare into the sun, no matter what NASA man said.
- Ground Control to Major Yum!
- Do you believe in aliens? Well then who keeps probing me when I go camping?
- When you are sending rockets into space, is there any worry that one of them will hit a flock of space geese and have to land safety in the Hudson?
- That’s NASA’s problem, you guys think too much.
- I am hooked so bad, I drink a couple of cups before I go to bed just to make it through all those boring dreams.
- Sorry about that, it’s a long show. You’re out of toilet paper, by the way.
- But how could I have been interviewing Paul McCartney when he’s dead? AAAAAH!
- Oh my God! This whole time I was seeing ghosts, I was drinking decaf. AAAAAAH!
- I never should have bought M. Night Shyamalan Coffee. It starts good, terrible finish.
- Let me ask you this – have you ever stood over a bubbly beaker and scremed, “Those fools at the academy!
- Are you injecting gasoline into third world babies?
- So a yeast infection would be a good thing after this?
- You’re talking about cars that run on poop, aren’t you. That’s a brave new world.
I was at the taping as well and my god it was wonderful. Stephen calling my best friend cute after she asked her question was the highlight for me. The show was fantastic and the audience’s enthusiasm was great too.
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And what was her question? :)
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Was that the Dr. Who question? (I’m already losing details)
Stephen said he didn’t watch Dr. Who, that it never really hooked him…
…then before the third act, he had them turn the music off so she could ask her question of Alison Silverman, who named her favorite Dr. Who.
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My best friend asked what was the geekiest thing he’s ever done NOT on the show. We had to specify.
The answer being he went to one of the early Gen Cons waaaay back in the day for some role playing goodness. And at the end of the question he remarked that he didn’t remember geeky girls being so cute. It totally made her night.
I’ll have an actual taping report up on my site hopefully tonight.
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Michael Steele segment once again stole the show for me. The Michael Steele saga has been batting 1.000 in winning my vote.
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The Rap-off segment was hilarious, but I voted for “Node 3 Renaming Status” because this line made my inner nerd very happy: “It turns out the contest is fixed, and not in a good way by my tech nerd army.”
I love being a part of Stephen’s tech nerd army!
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This is only going to March 20th and it is fixed. We really need to fight and vote as much as possible within the rules.
I’m thinking of making a little sign to put up at grocery stores. That could be a way of gaining more votes. What do you think Nation? You can all do this too actually.
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This interview was the best. Making fuel out of germs.
The Nasa Node 3 will only be going to March 20th and it is fixed. We really need to fight and vote as much as possible within the rules.
I’m thinking of making a little sign to put up at grocery stores. That could be a way of gaining more votes. What do you think Nation? You can all do this too actually.
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The “tech nerd army” was my favorite line of the night. We really are like an army, aren’t we?
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I’m with you, Jenny with a Y. Love being part of Stephen’s tech nerd army. Booyah!
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Here’s the explanation for the Bollywood/India spy/Slumdog references in Act 1:
During the Q & A pre-show, a guy asked if Stephen was going Bollywood, and of course Stephen attempted a Indian dance move, then asked the guy to show him some dance moves… which SC copied exactly on the spot! They flailed around side-by-side while we went crazy. Stunning.
Plus someone asked about his Prince moves earlier, which sent Stephen scuttling across the floor preening and smoothing his hair (if you remember Prince doing this, you’ll know what I mean)!
My first taping (hopefully there will be more), and god we were hyped. I was first in line (with my taping buddy bipolypesca) so got ticket blue#1 and first seat, front row, right in front of the desk. And what a great show to be at. Stephen flirted with us on several occasions and nodded approval for our groovy (geeky?) seat-dancing. I couldn’t ask for more.
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funny thing: when Stephen starting screaming from drinking coffee and seeing ghosts, I – while laughing hysterically – thought it seemed familiar, but couldn’t place it.
Only just now did I realize it was a flashback from his Christmas Special when Elvis was being eaten by the bear.
Anyone remember any other screaming occasions on the Report?
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yeah! when he saw OBAMA written backwards on the brownies sometime last year! that’s what I was thinking of!
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do you know what show that was? I don’t remember that one!
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from last September, it’s called “High Altitude Brownies”
(or you can search “amabo” at colbertnation.com)
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*sigh* Wow! What a wonderful story! Thanks so much for sharing it with us!
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Thank you for telling us the story. That was great!
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Need to tell you this. There are 2 other people in the grocery store where i work who watch The Colbert Report. We talk about it now sometimes. More on Twitter. This is cool.
Now back to the original topic
Sorry. Can’t wait.
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Thanks for sharing the taping story, LeeQuick! I was definitely wondering what the specific question was that the audience member asked. That was awesome how much Stephen was interacting with that audience member on camera (and off!).
The screaming was also in the Christmas special, near the very beginning. When Stephen first opened the door to leave his cabin and a bear was there, so he started screaming and was screaming during the opening credits when a graphic of a wreathe was around his face. lol.
I voted for the whole screaming segment, as my favorite. I sure love when that man acts a fool. (okay, so that’s basically every segment, but still)
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loved it! love the stories! excellent show! love screaming and rapping!
I’m in a hurry so I need to tell you all this is short bursts! :D
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Let me ask you this – have you ever stood over a bubbly beaker and screamed, “Those fools at the academy!”
This was my favorite question. Hee!
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I loved that too! I voted for the interview with Keasling because of that line and because I find his research very interesting.
Gerstenmaier is *such* an engineer! LOL! I found him very amusing, although I doubt he intended to be.
The coffee bit was hilarious as well. “The demon bean” LOL!
Thanks for sharing your experience, LeeQuick. That front row seat right in front of the desk is the best isn’t it? That’s where I sat back in January. I’m trying to convince my husband we need to take a kid-free mini-vacation to NYC this summer so I can go to another taping.
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one more taping story:
I want to tell you about my absolute favorite part of the taping. During the NASA interview, which was pre-taped, I watched Stephen watching the interview. He sat still and gazed at the monitor with the most incredibly happy, boyish excitement, and smiled at every joke. His expressions were boundlessly joyful and exquisite… almost indescribable. I could literally sit and observe Stephen watching his own show for hours on end.
[and in case you are wondering, there was no trace of narcissism in him, just joy...pure joy.]
And the joke about anal probing totally cracked Stephen up… he nearly did a *headdesk* when he heard himself say “enough is enough”.
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“….and in case you are wondering, there was no trace of narcissism in him, just joy…pure joy”
I know exactly what you mean! You might think less of some comedians when they laugh at their own jokes, but I think Stephen just embraces the whole joyous situation and all parties involved. He just loves laughter and life!
By the way, were half the Zoners at the show last night? Haha! Who else besides Flatpoint Grief Counselor, Page, LeeQuick and Britt were there?! Did you make your Zoner membership known?
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Flatpoint Grief Counselor and LeeQuick are the same person… me.
I’m on someone else’s computer while in NYC and can’t figure out how to change my login… sorry for the confusion. Or maybe I am my own ghost…… AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!
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Haha! Thanks for the verification and the ghost shout-out;)
That’s still three Zoners at one show! Awesome!
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“His expressions were boundlessly joyful and exquisite… almost indescribable”
Thanks for the taping tidbits LeeQuick! I had a similar experience observing him at a taping watching a “Difference Maker” segment, he beamed, laughed and was completely engaged in the segment looking like a little boy on Christmas morning. It was a joy to behold.
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I’d love to be able to see that enjoyment in person. I’m glad I can hear about that stuff here. Why can’t I be out there?
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I’m so terribly jealous and also incredibly grateful for your stories about your taping adventures. :) The entire show was a very great way to end my work day, and I voted for the Michael Steele segment because of the nuances of the hip-hop/rap language that Stephen used (trippin’ vs. buggin’, for instance). I’m always pretty fascinated with stuff like that. :)
Note to self: don’t start drinking decaf. Haha! :)
reCAPTCHA: Wutbering Alaskan
(Hmmm…)
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If you look during the closing segment at his wrist, he’s not wearing the wriststrong bracelet he was wearing for the entire show. It’s because I have it! :) It sooo pays off to sit in the front and get to flirt with Colbert. Lee Quick can cover me on that one.
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F***in A!
The most hysterical part was after a bout of extended flirting with Britt, Stephen mouthed these words at her: “I…. (makes-heart-shape-with-fingers) love….. me.”
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*sigh* Just wonderful. I can’t wait to hopefully get to a taping myself in the summer.
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Hey, Britt, e-mail me, will ya? bipolypesca*at*gmail*dot*com
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It looked like he was trying to lure me up there but I knew that if I even hinted to get up the bulldog security guards would annihilate me. But that was so funny. F***in A all the way! Ooh-Rah!!
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Oh, Britt and Lee Quick! How cool that you were both there. I can almost wish myself back into the studio at will. October 20 will always be special for me.
Thanks for the inside scoop on the Bollywood stuff.
He made me feel special, too, when I was there.
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by the way, if there are any John Oliver fans here, I have a fantastic story about meeting John Monday night after the Purim show. He was incredibly nice and gracious enough to pose for a photo on his way out of the gig. Plus, he was no doubt the funniest thing in the show… says me.
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I’ve tried to respond to your comment with my own show report (I was there, too), but can’t seem to post it. Maybe it’s too long. :)
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DB suggested I try posting it again…
*
Me, too. :) I was there at 12:30 to claim the first spot in line, so Flatpoint Grief Counselor and I were in the front row (seats #1 & #2). It was amazing. Stephen was fake-flirting with me, too (which he did with a few different audience members while waiting for segments to start; I guess that’s his shtick). He was giving me that raised-eyebrow-looking-you-up-and-down-approvingly look, and I raised my eyebrow back at him, and then saluted him. He gestured at my WristStrong bracelet, and then at his WristStrong bracelet, nodding his approval. I was like, “Yeah, WristStrong!” showing off my bracelet.
The funny part was that he caught my eye twice before that, and I kept looking away, embarrassed to be caught staring. And then I’m like, “You idiot! The entire ROOM is staring!” LOL So I guess I almost missed out.
I was also really fond of watching him watch his own interview, like Flatpoint Grief Counselor said. His grin was seriously contagious, and I totally agree with the person who said “little boy on Christmas.” That’s it exactly.
I, Flatpoint Grief Counselor, and Britt and her friend (we met in line) waited for him after the show, but he was in a real hurry. He did wave at us and say, “Hey, guys! Good night!” as he was getting into his ride, but he was seriously in a rush. The rehersal went kind of long, so I think he was later getting out than he thought he would be.
All in all, it was an 8 hour round trip and a 6 1/2 hour wait in line and in that horrible little room, but I’d do it again in a heartbeat.
He was close enough to touch when he was answering questions–I mean, RIGHT in front of me. I nearly had to sit on my hands…
We were a really good audience, I think. I was watching our episode and comparing it to recent episodes, and we were so much louder than some of the recent audiences. So, I’m proud of that. :) I was hoarse all day Wednesday from the screaming.
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Oh! And I almost forgot:
After the show was over, we were giving him a standing ovation, and he just kind of wandered around the set like he was alone at home and had nothing to do and was vaguely bored. He messed around with some stuff on the shelves, juggled some balls, whistled two inches in front of a camera lens, until he finally broke up at the ridiculousness of it all and said good night. Charming. :)
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