Episode 5027 – R.A.P.S. (Awesome!)
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I don’t know about you guys, but the show was a huge adrenalin rush for me tonight. I blame the spiders.
I thought the Twitter reference was way cool as I follow multiple politicians on my own Twitter account and enjoy their tweets. And I have to admit, when the Tarantula handler busted out the G. Roseas and started putting them all over Stephen I jumped in my seat a bit. I have 13 tarantulas as pets (including a G. Rosea ), and have owned spiders for over 10 years, and I wouldn’t have put spiders all over me. While Roseys are about the most tame spiders out there, and are affectionately called “Pet Rocks” in the hobby, if you’ve ever seen the fangs on these bad boys you will appreciate Stephen’s bravery for the sake of a very powerful punch line. I hope those urticating hairs that Rosey was flicking off landed on Stephen’s coat and not his hands. Those things itch worse than insulation!
Tip of the Hat/Wag of the Finger was awesome as always, made even nicer by a very rattled Stephen and a character break. Sex and the Ganges was just so very wrong, and yet at the same time snicker-worthy. Although the interview wasn’t necessarily a laughfest, it was a really good discussion about what “regular” Americans are going through with the recession, and John Fetterman made an excellent case for his town. If you missed the Colbert County Stephen Colbert museum segment series that was mentioned by Stephen during the interview, you can check out the videos on ColbertNation.com.
Give a shout out in the comments if the spiders freaked you out as much as they did me, or feel free to share any other feelings you may have about tonight’s segments. Here’s some of the more memorable quotes from tonight’s show:
- I apologize, I thought he was going to throw me beads.
- That is why they [Republican] support abstinence education.
- Jimmy, let’s look at the rest of the highlights. There are none? Okay.
- Those are the numbers that get you into the Empty Platitude Hall of Fame.
- Sorry, Big O. That’s what you get for filling your speeches with words instead of pauses and confident squints.
- Evidently, he can tweet with his mind.
- Lou Dobbs is cool?
- With an N-Word Here and An N-Word There
- Now I will speak frankly about rap music while eating dollar store peanut butter.
- Were you offended … oh s@#t.
- Oh my God! I’m so sorry for slavery! Just get this spider out of my hair!
- Don’t pretend you can’t understand me, gorillas, I know some of you speak sign language.
- YOU DAMN DIRTY APES YOU GAVE US CRABS!
- Oh that old story – Honey, I didn’t bang that gorilla, I was just using his sleeping site!
- Now we know why Mario was so mad at that Donkey. Kong.
- I have to say, I haven’t recovered from those spiders yet.
- You know you should do with some of that money … put in skyboxes, because then you get the big ticket items.
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41 Comments
February 26th, 2009 at 12:33 am
DB! Tonight’s episode totally had you on my mind, with the spider and Twitter segment. I knew you were probably about to go into complete fan-girl mode in Texas! :)
The Twitter thing actually freaked me out myself, b/c right after I logged into mine to send a few *tweets*, he name dropped the site! Too coincidental! :)
Also, during The Word, there was a Dave Matthews reference which made me smile, considering I have been a *huge* fan for years!
This week has been full of great shows… can’t wait for tomorrow!
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
Yeah they have really been ON FIRE this week. I loved all three guests so far. When he pulled his shirt up for a second, I thought I would see an OMG post. But that was not one of his best moments. Anything for a laugh.
I loved the character break during the spider segment. I sort of saw that coming.
If my Mom was in his seat, she would not even get close to those! She’s afraid of bugs.
Also, I love the fact that twitter is in the news now. I bet twitter has got millions more people tweeting. I was twittering almost through the whole episode!
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:37 pm
On a slightly off topic note, Important Things with Demitri Martin was great last night. I loved the bit with John Olover.
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February 26th, 2009 at 12:46 am
Haha, I wish I could’ve been in the audience for the tarantula bit. I’m way curious about what Stephen said during the break. I wouldn’t have been able to let one spider leg touch me without spazzing.
Though his lines were short, I thought the handler’s delivery was excellent too. ;)
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:23 am
He said he has a huge problem with spiders. As a fellow tarantula owner, I loved the bit!
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:25 am
What kind of spider do you have? Do you have a Chilean Rose or another type?
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:27 am
Yep, a Chilean Rose. Named Rose. Go figure. I’ve had two others named Penelope and Isabelle Ringing.
February 26th, 2009 at 1:30 am
Cool. I had a Chilean Rose for a very long time, until they accidentally exterminated in my rental unit. Grr!
My Rosey’s name was Fifi. :) My current spiders don’t have names, though. I just call them by their Latin names, which is real fun for most of the spiders (Grammostola aureostriata anyone?).
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February 26th, 2009 at 11:40 am
@Allisa:
Let me know if/when you have a taping report!
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:35 pm
Yes, please tell us.
February 26th, 2009 at 1:35 am
Though his lines were short, I thought the handler’s delivery was excellent too. ;)
Gaia Faye, I agree. The spider handler was so calm and laconic he was hilarious, especially playing off of Colbert’s obviously increasing tension.
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February 27th, 2009 at 12:12 am
Yes! He had great timing. At one point Stephen even got a little bit ahead of him and I was like, “Quiet, Colbert, let the man work!”
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:03 am
I like tarantulas and I’m sorry they’re dangerous. same goes for snakes. I think snakes are adorable and I wish they felt the same way about me.
I thought the Word was pretty decent. I mean I had to vote for it to give props for the tarantulas. also I like when Stephen addresses race. he does it more and more these days and it keeps me thinking.
I have to say that I was eager to tweet about Twitter appearing on the show. I only follow two DC politicians. any suggestions of good ones?
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:14 am
Does the wonderful Eleanor Holmes Norton have Twitter?? :)
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February 26th, 2009 at 2:10 am
Not that I know of, but she’s got link to her ‘Colbert Report’ vids on her web site – http://www.norton.house.gov/
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:16 am
The spiders freaked me out. I was just like, “Please don’t put it on his head, please don’t put it on his head… noooo, why’d you let them put it on your head!?!” And I didn’t like the close ups of the spiders. I had my hand up covering the screen and I felt like I was too creeped out to laugh.
But I sure loved seeing Stephen flash us right at the top of the show!
And I loved the line, “Jimmy, let’s look at the rest of the highlights. There are none? Okay.” I like whenever Stephen looks off to the side like that and will be all, “it isn’t? Okay, they’re telling me it isn’t.”
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:19 am
My favorite example of the now dubbed Jimmy Side-Glance is the Steel Magnolia Ya-Ya Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. Classic!
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:39 am
Haha, yes! That video as a whole is full of win and is a great example of the side glance.
And, of course, Colbert weeping is pure gold!
Also, in tonight’s episode, after the little Donkey Kong character break, you could hear a girl in the audience say, “Awwww!” when Stephen said he was still shaken up by the spiders. lol.
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February 26th, 2009 at 11:50 am
I caught that too. You have very attentive ears. : )
February 26th, 2009 at 1:20 am
I agree, the quick flash was a great way to start the show. ;)
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:32 am
At one time the tarantula segment would have had me petrified and probably unable to watch. Over the years I’ve learned to control the phobia (drug therapy helped). I’m still not a fan of tarantulas and doubt that I could do what Stephen did, but knowing you DB and how you must have felt, it made me very excited to watch. I think Colbert may have few difficult days (or nights) “ahead” flashing back to the spider in the hair, but he did it! He overcame a natural fear/panic that most people would never test themselves against. If this isn’t a shout-out to you I don’t know what would be; it may be the purest fan-tribute action he’s ever performed on the show.
I thought the guest John Fetterman was eloquent in his own way discussing the very real and growing problem in the smaller cities and towns in the U.S. The modesty of his desires to rebuild the town to a functioning level was very effectively conveyed, which seemed to put a true human face (not a politician’s face) on the desperate situation. I hope that his appearance on The Colbert Report will result in small but significantly better times ahead for his town.
My personal favorite moment was Colbert’s mention of Pai Gow poker. I remember playing the tables of Pai Gow in Reno with a Japanese friend who had learned it from his Chinese friends. I think of it as a kind of Asian Euchre, though Pai Gow players take the game more seriously that most serious Euchre player. I still have the Flamingo Hotel t-shirt from that trip long long ago and wear it to bed. Talk about durable goods! (apologies for the rambling memory)
A very good episode and a most memorable one for DB. The Colbert Report writers and the man himself must truly think NFZ rocks because Stephen isn’t going to put a tarantula on his head for just anyone! ;-D
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:37 am
Heh, while I appreciate the sentiment, I feel pretty darn certain it was not a shout-out. Someday NFZ may get an actual official shout out, yes, but I just don’t feel that this was the one.
However, I do think it was terribly brave for Stephen to allow a tarantula to be put on his head. That even gave me the heebie jeebies, and I *love* tarantulas! You know, to look at, not so much for ornamentation of any kind.
It will definitely be a memorable show for me, though, I’ll grant you that.
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February 26th, 2009 at 2:04 am
Your modesty is one of your most beautiful qualities.
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:46 pm
Stephen will do anything for the delight of his Colbert Completist fans here. I love him very much.
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February 26th, 2009 at 2:01 am
While the tarantulas were definitely shocking to say the least, I thought the Word was a little weak in and of itself.
Tip/Wag got my vote tonight for the unbeatable combo of character break + absolutely hilarious lines, especially about the gorillas.
The guest, Mayor Fetterman, was also very interesting. I feel so sorry for his town! Hopefully the right people perk up and pay attention to his town and in a year or so Mayor Fetterman can come back with some good news.
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February 26th, 2009 at 7:58 am
Another pair of it-getters? Did anyone else read yesterday’s Real-Life Adventures comic? Don’t know if I’m allowed to post a link to it, but here goes: http://www.gocomics.com/reallifeadventures/2009/02/25/
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February 26th, 2009 at 8:18 am
hahah, Stephen exposing himself freaked me out more than the spiders (in a good way of course)
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February 26th, 2009 at 4:05 pm
haha! me too! it just completely took me off guard! you’d think i’d of learned by now to expect the unexpected. :)
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February 26th, 2009 at 10:53 am
I live pretty close to Braddock–it is outside of Pittsburgh. I really liked the “softer side of Stephen” paired with his humor in the interview. You could tell that he really wanted to get the word out about this little town–and those like it.
Of course, I loved the spiders, character break, and the flashing!
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February 26th, 2009 at 11:01 am
Best episode of the week IMO and props to Stephen for enduring the spiders for the sake of the bit, he looked REALLY uncomfortable – does he actually have a spider phobia or was it just icky for him? He was also brave to eat the dollar store peanut butter!
p.s. Yes Stephen you deserved beads for flashing. That elliptical machine is working for you. :)
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February 26th, 2009 at 11:56 am
I am absolutely terrified of spiders…and most insects in general (except for maybe houseflies) and I could barely watch when the handler put tarantulas all over him. Big props to Stephen for actually getting through some lines while having to endure big, huge, fuzzy, scary spiders crawling all over him (*cringes*). I had to watch something after the show just so I wouldn’t have nightmares about tarantulas all night long. *shivers*
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February 26th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Spiders aren’t insects, they’re arachnids. :)
I thought the segment was hilarious, and I was reminded of a friend of mine who used to work in the invertebrate house at the National Zoo. She used to walk around with tarantulas and other critters on her shoulders/head, and she told me the cutest story about this kid who had come in with his dad and stared, wide-eyed at her the whole time they were there. When they were walking out, this kid holding his dad’s hand, he turned for one last amazed look at my friend, and gave her a very small wave and said, “Bye-bye, spid-o-lady.” Awwww!
Hurrah for the return of the Table of Contents and The WØRD (although I agree with mrtigger that this one was more gimmicky and perhaps less verbally biting than usual), and yay for another generally entertaining show!
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:38 pm
What an adorable story! :-)
I like insects and spiders and snakes myself so I wasn’t at all bothered by the tarantulas, although it looked liked Stephen was genuinely uncomfortable with them. I cringed at him eating the “dollar store peanut butter”. LOL!
And yes, “Sex and the Ganges” was so wrong but oh so funny.
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February 26th, 2009 at 1:50 pm
You’re too afraid Lisa
ReCaptcha: locally WMCA
Should be local YMCA.
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February 27th, 2009 at 1:06 pm
I’ve been terrified of spiders since I was a kid — I think I might be one of those folks who would need some therapy to get over it, to be quite honest. Just ask my other half, who is the official Arachnid/Insect Remover at our house.
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February 26th, 2009 at 3:55 pm
I used to be terrified of spiders across the board–now as long as they
a) are not poisonous
b) are smaller than a quarter
c) stay out of my personal space and especially don’t do that little smartass “WHEE rappelling down from the ceiling RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE LOL” trick
I leave them be. I’m okay with them because I know they eat bugs I like even less.
That said, the thought of having a tarantula–even though I know they’re pretty harmless–on my head makes me want to curl up in a little twitching ball.
Mad props to Stephen for that, then, because I could never ever ever do it.
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February 26th, 2009 at 5:14 pm
Stephen, I loved your flashing your torso, but shouldn’t that have been on Mardi Gras rather than Ash Wednesday?! Now I’ve already failed at one of my Lenten resolutions;) Also, I thought his gray tie on Tuesday would have been perfect for Ash Wednesday…and his bold red, white and blue tie on Wednesday perfect for Fat Tuesday. Oh well. I guess the show is still pretty good;)
I initially thought that tarantulas were poisonous and figured they had taken the venom out before placing them on Stephen, but then was relieved to learn they are not poisonous…though they still have quite a bite! I believe reading from a teleprompter while three tarantulas are crawling over you is more impressive than patting your head and rubbing your stomach.
What a fabulous show!
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February 26th, 2009 at 7:36 pm
Elephant!!!!!
*ahem*
I’m glad that John Fetterman was able to use TCR as a platform to really highlight what the US is going through, similar to what Eleanor Holmes Norton has done to push for DC voting rights. Some of these stories are just swept under the rug, but that doesn’t mean they will go away. I wish him great success.
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February 26th, 2009 at 9:21 pm
Ohhhh, this is gonna be one fun episode to watch! :D
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February 26th, 2009 at 9:26 pm
I will not lie, those tarantulas freaked me out. But I thought, hey, DB will love this!
Stephen flashing his manly chest at the top of the show was pretty awesome. He did the same thing when I was there for a screening of the Christmas special last fall. He wasn’t doing it for the cameras back then, he was just doing it for the enjoyment of the fangirls in the audience. He was also wearing his own clothes at the time.
My first thought when I saw the guest: OMG, former professional wrestler! Heh. But he did make some very serious points about how some areas of the country are struggling with this disaster of an economy. I hope he gets the help he needs for his town.
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February 26th, 2009 at 10:02 pm
Great show. Flashing! Spiders! Interspecies sex jokes! Earnest appeals for a dying town!
I loved the spiders. Don’t know if he has an actual phobia or not, but he appeared twitchy enough around them during the Spida of Love contest that I wondered if it was more than just acting. And as ColbertGirl27 said, it’s a real feat to read a teleprompter with one on your head!
I also really appreciated the interview. Though Braddock sounds like it’s in a heap of trouble, and one that’s only growing, they’re certainly lucky to have a mayor who can so clearly and compassionately articulate the problems his and so many other towns are facing. He obviously cares deeply about his community, and is working to make it better. I love that Stephen uses his platform to bring good causes to light.
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