Episode 5002 – R.A.P.S. (Awesome!)
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This episode of The Colbert Report is exactly what I needed after the crazy and stressful day I had! Stephen was very high energy tonight and, as usual, I was impressed by the writers and graphics department. For me, Better Know a District was the highlight of the show. The entire segment was hilarious! I was especially happy when Stephen brought out Sweetness the gun because Sweetness is one of my all-time favorite TCR characters. And, how funny was the leg wrestling?
Here are some notable quotes:
- That kind of ovation I got is really the sort of thing that turns me on.
- Tell me about your black person. Is he nice?
- I don’t actually care.
- Send Me Your Gold: 1-888-OOPS-JEWEL
- Who’s watching my show? Who’s watching my show?
- Your dead idea is dead.
Please feel free to leave a comment or add a write-in vote for something not included in the poll.
Edited to add: If you haven’t called 1-888-OOPS-JEWEL, you’ll want to do so. It’s hysterical!
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34 Comments
January 7th, 2009 at 12:43 am
For me, the highlight of the show was definitely the return of BKAD and Sweetness. He’s so deliciously hilarious and creepy, and I have crazy amounts of love for that gun. I also have to say to all the politicians out there: See? It’s not so bad! Please go on the show again! BKAD is one of my favorite segments! I need more!
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January 7th, 2009 at 12:52 am
Hands down, definitely BKAD! I love that Sweetness went on, what appears to be, a field trip of sorts. Hehehe…
Do yourselves a favor and call the phone number — you’ll be glad you did. I just couldn’t resist.
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January 7th, 2009 at 1:02 am
Hahah! I called the number, too! Very funny!! I always appreciate the little details and the level of thought that goes into each episode of TCR. Of course they had an actual phone number the Colbert Nation could call rather than a fake “555″ number like TV programs usually use.
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January 7th, 2009 at 6:45 am
Pardon my curiosity, but could you share what happened when you called? I’m not in the USA but am able to catch episodes of TDS and TCR online. :) Grazie!
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:33 am
I called during the ad break right after the number appeared. The first time it was busy, then I got thru — it was a man’s voice (not Colbert) instructing me to rub my gold against the phone… and I’ll leave it at that.
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:41 am
sorry — Jewels. Rub your jewels against the phone.
and it sounds like the same voice from the Atone Phone: 888-OOPS-JEW. (of course it’s the same number)
January 7th, 2009 at 11:01 am
I just called that. Hilarious. If I can find a way, I’ll capture the audio.
January 7th, 2009 at 2:36 pm
I wonder whose voice it is.
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January 7th, 2009 at 1:06 am
Just called the number–hilarious! Of course, the entire episode was great! Loved it…and in the opening credits it did say “Colmes free since 2009″ Quick, but genious! I am hoping the teasers will return-I miss them and I love it when Stephen yells “This is the Colbert Report!”
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January 7th, 2009 at 2:35 am
Was that a Lady Diana Spencer Royal Engagement Replica Ring? XD
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January 7th, 2009 at 3:28 am
I don’t know, but I love that he wore the ring throughout the rest of the show:)
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January 7th, 2009 at 3:33 am
I loved seeing the return of BKAD! Thank for you coming on the show Rep. Chaffetz…and talking to sweetness:) Haha! I think you were polite and allowed Stephen to win at leg wrestling…or maybe not. Stephen’s talents do seem endless!
I’ve missed BKAD so much and I hope Rep. Chaffetz has inspired others to come on the show.
P.S. I didn’t think I would actually hear anything if I called the number. Thanks for the tip Jenny with a Y! During the commerical break, there was a local ad for Joe’s Gold. I guess someone else wants my gold besides Stephen…although Joe is willing to give me some money for it;)
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January 7th, 2009 at 5:36 am
Sweetness is AWESOME! I wish the congressman had been packing and was willing to show his.
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January 7th, 2009 at 6:04 am
Can I just say that I found the sun cute? Especially when that human volcano erupted. :)
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January 7th, 2009 at 6:46 am
Too bad it wasn’t Colbert’s voice on the phone. LOL!
And BKAD was fabulous. “How is your black person?” hahahaha!
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:15 am
They knew if they put his voice on the phone all the fangirls would keep calling!
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January 7th, 2009 at 6:49 pm
Yes.
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January 7th, 2009 at 7:01 am
What the H happened to the opening jokes before the theme song? I thought maybe because of the C&C thing on Monday night that it was just a temporary thing, but then it’s missing again! Are those jokes getting too hard to write?
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:31 am
Only because I just said (in an email to CU) that the Table of Contents was in every show. So they decided to stop doing it.
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January 7th, 2009 at 11:41 am
Oh, the irony! We’re actually still working on a revamp of that particular course. I think we have most of the kinks worked out. But, we appreciate you alerting us to the fact that it needed it. : )
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January 7th, 2009 at 3:58 pm
I’ve noticed that when they have two guests on, they often skip the TOC. I would imagine it’s to save time.
Ok, it was a tough call for me between BKAD and OOPS – JEWEL. And the message is hilarious! I ended up voting for BKAD because it’s one of my favorite segments and last night’s was particularly funny. Poor guy looked so nervous and uncomfortable, but it was just so funny. “How’s your black person?”, “Who’s watching my show?!”, the appearance of sweetness and the leg wrestling all had me laughing so hard I had to watch the segment again to make sure I heard everything. Oh I hope more Reps go on the show now!
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January 7th, 2009 at 8:26 am
WOOHOOO for a new BKAD! I can’t wait to see more of those again…I’ve missed it so much. Dude played along with it very well. YAY for Sweetness! I just love how Stephen softens up when he brings Sweetness out. It’s so endearing XD lol… “hefty tabernacles” And the sweet talking to the younger viewers was precious. “WHO’S WATCHING MY SHOW! WOOJABOOJABOO!”
I vote that we need to see some more Colbert leg wrestling.
That gold ad was beautiful! I love when people make fun of those ridiculous “give us your gold” advertisements. I wonder what the ringtone for 1-888-OOPS-JEWEL would be.
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:37 am
BKAD was so great! Oh Sweetness! And lmao at the leg wrestling.
The gold thing was absolutely hysterical as well.
What happens when you call the number? I just tried to call it but nothing happened. Maybe it only worked right after the show?
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:43 am
try again… it’s working… I just called again.
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:54 am
haha, okay, I just got through! That was funny lol.
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January 7th, 2009 at 10:43 am
fun! I loved the frantic jewels bit–I have had more exposure to those sorts of ads actually watching TCR than anywhere else! that got my RAPS vote.
BKAD was nice too though. I enjoyed getting cooed at for watching the show as an 18-24 yr old viewer. for many in that bracket that I know, that is age appropriate talk. ha. also, the leg wrestling was extreme! woah!
from the way he spoke, I felt like the Congressman was nervous, which I understand, but it makes me a little nervous. then again, they all probably have to clam up for their own good!
I thought there was a new intro word, from the shape of it, but I didn’t watch close enough to catch it. also, I really want the beginnings to come back. maybe people aren’t cheering right too much. still, just starting with the eagle just hearkens back to this time last year and why do that?
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January 7th, 2009 at 11:45 am
Great episode all around and the BKAD was hilarious. I think Stephen won the leg wrestling fair and square, I can’t believe the Congressman actually went there! More please!
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January 7th, 2009 at 12:08 pm
I don’t often get to watch TCR at its original air time, but I was up late last night and had to watch it. The BKAD segment was hilarious and the Congressman seemed to be enjoying himself. The leg wrestling was great (who wouldn’t want to leg wrestle with Stephen?). For those who haven’t called OOPS JEWEL yet, do so immediately. Welcome back, Stephen! We’ve missed you.
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January 7th, 2009 at 12:21 pm
Oh, BKAD, how I have missed you! It was even better with the appearance by Sweetness, but the leg wrestling completely did me in. Stephen’s anything-for-a-laugh approach to his work still amazes me sometimes.
I really missed the Table of Contents last night. I could understand why they didn’t do it for the “Colbert & Colmes” show on Monday, but the show last night felt incomplete without it. The Table of Contents sets the tone for the entire show, and those tag lines at the end are often some of the funniest lines.
ETA: Wow, I just got a weird error message when I posted this. But the comment went through, so I guess it’s okay?
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January 7th, 2009 at 7:14 pm
It was so hard to choose! but leg wrestling made my life. What a great episode! full of so many good segments! I loved it.
And I just called OOPS JEWEL!! hahaha that was so funny. :D
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January 7th, 2009 at 8:10 pm
I believe the voice at OOPS-JEWEL might be Colbert’s. Sounds very similar to his voice from the Exit 57 Marriage Counseling sketch, especially as it gets “breathy” at the end.
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January 7th, 2009 at 9:31 pm
my fav line was from the interview!
“is that like take no prisoners p__sy?”
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January 8th, 2009 at 1:27 am
BKAD! Yay! The whole episode was terrific, but I heart BKAD. And the phone message is a riot. I love this show.
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January 9th, 2009 at 1:29 am
As a viewer in the 18-24 demographic, I must say Stephen really spoke to me during the BKAD. Can’t pinpoint what it was… just something about the way he said, “Who’s watching my show?”… just felt like he was speaking my language. That’s what I call hard-hitting journalism.
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