Six Degrees: The “McLaughin’ Group” takes us through a post-Super Tuesday routine

Oh, that crazy “McLaughin’ Group“! From the New York Times:

Comedy Stop: Cold Turkey Wednesday
By The McLaughin’ Group

The first 24 post-Super-Tuesday hours are the hardest.

. . .

11:00 a.m.: I’ve got the shakes. The kind that can only be calmed by Anderson Cooper explaining a pie chart. Why doesn’t that come in a patch?

11:25 a.m.: Accidentally call wife “Hillary.” Slapped across face.

11:40 p.m.: Order “The Passion of the Christ” from Netflix in order to court evangelical vote.

12:15 p.m.: Accidentally call wife “Mitt.” Hit over the head with chair. I don’t blame her.

1:00 p.m.: Make it up to wife with surprise “red and blue foods” lunch: beets and some moldy leftover I found in the back of the fridge.

3:13 p.m.: Spent two solid hours at HotOrNot.com just for something to vote on. Hair of the dog.

. . .

8:00 p.m.: Read daughter bedtime story. Dr. Seuss’s “One Fish, Two Fish, Red State, Blue State.” Why is she crying?

9:30 p.m.: Walt Conroy calls. Wants my vote for president of the Neighborhood Watch Association. Not without Ted Kennedy’s endorsement, pal.

11:15 p.m.: Attempt role play with wife in bed. She refuses to be Chris Matthews. My Matthews Meter is at an all-time low.

11:35 p.m.: Finally admit I need help. I dial 911, but the numerals remind me of failed Giuliani campaign. The sobs come fast and hard.

. . .

Full day’s schedule available here

Since I failed to notice the McLaughin’ Group’s suggested alternatives for “Super Tuesday”, here’s a link to that one, too: Comedy Stop: Super Tuesday? It’s All About the Name. I think my fave might be, “Tuesday in the Park with George: All balloting takes place in a beautiful park, while Mandy Patinkin sings about his ambivalence.”

Funny stuff, guys! We hope to see you all back with the show very soon …